Having a baby during a Pandemic really doesn’t seem like the most ideal timing. There were times during the end of my pregnancy that I felt waves of despair and sadness that we were being robbed of this special time.
So much was different to how we’d pictured it would be. There’s no baby showers, no going and choosing that going home outfit for baby, no showing off your blooming bump. Maternity services withdrawn. Birth plans out of the window, home birth cancelled, appointments with midwives taking place in full PPE. It’s all just so far removed to what any Muma to be would imagine this special time to be.
For me the most heartbreaking thing was that our families would not be able to meet our precious new arrival. One of my favourite memories after Joshua’s birth was when our Mums and sister in law came to meet him. It was a time so full of joyous emotion, and a memory I’ll always treasure. We wouldn’t have this experience this time. Our family would have to make do with ‘meeting’ baby Hope by looking at her through the front room window. Holding my gorgeous new born baby up to a window so her Nanny could see her for the first time was truly heartbreaking.
However, now we’re a good few weeks in and this situation, while not ideal, does have it’s positives. I’m actually finding this postpartum period less stressful than I did when we had Joshua. There’s no where to go, nothing to do and no one lining up at the door to visit. The only things we need to focus on are spending time with the children.
I’m aware that I’m very lucky in having a supportive ‘hands on’ partner. So I guess my experience is positive because of that. I am aware that sadly there are Mamas out there that don’t have that support. I can only begin to imagine how hard this time must be in that scenario.
For me, lock down has given me a totally different perspective on my pace of life in general.
I’ve always made it so that i’m spinning too many plates at once. As my husband would say – never happy unless i’ve got lots of stuff to do and stress about.
Nothing to prove
When I had Joshua, I felt I needed to prove I could ‘do this’, that I had it all sussed out and under control. I put a lot of pressure on myself; had to make my midwife home made short bread as a thank you, couldn’t ‘cheat’ and buy some. Needed to make sure the house was tidy for visitors. Needed to able to ‘host’ when people came to see us.
None of these scenarios were relevant this time. I’ve been able to focus totally on our new journey as a family of 4, and on allowing my body to recover from the miracle of growing and birthing a small human!
Cuddling my babies
Many a day has been spent in my PJ’s un-showered. The house often looks like its been turned upside down and shaken! And do you know what? I’m fine with that. I’ve spent a wonderful amount of time just resting and cuddling my babies. Not having to share the cuddles with endless visitors has it’s bonuses; but that’s a whole other post!). That’s time that I will never get back!
The dishes can wait, my hair will be washed again one day, but my babies will never be this small and dependent on me again. Enjoy the cuddles, the slower pace of life and take care of yourself.
Lock down life is not so bad after all………………………………….
For more info on the 4th Trimester check out https://www.healthline.com/health/pregnancy/4th-trimester#4th-trimester-for-baby
Take at look at some of our postnatal services such as ‘closing the Bones’ http://thepositivehypnobirthingcompany.co.uk/closing-the-bones/